|
Post by lusciouslois on Aug 17, 2006 12:17:57 GMT -5
Men-if you knew that your wife loved to party before u got married to her and she decides, years later, that she wanted to start partying again, what would you say? Mind you, you yourself dont like to go out a lot, at least to clubs and bars and she claims you are a "stuffed shirt." Now that partying from her is causing major problems in your marriage. Ladies-does he have a right to be upset or "dictate to you?"
|
|
|
Post by Blaque on Aug 17, 2006 12:35:06 GMT -5
Ladies-does he have a right to be upset or "dictate to you?" We are talking about a MARRIED couple, correct? I would have to say yes, the husband does have a right to be upset. First of all, why is she going out if she already know that her husband doesn't approve? I don't think that this has anything to do with her husband being a dictator. It has to do with a wife respecting her husband. If anything, she should invite her husband along with her. If it were me, I wouldn't do anything that I knew was going to cause an unnecessary argument. I think my desire to please my husband would be greater than a desire to go out with my girls. (OK, I really think my man is brainwashing me.)
|
|
|
Post by lusciouslois on Aug 17, 2006 12:44:43 GMT -5
Yes, they are married Here within the past several months, she has gotten a hair up her butt and just HAS to go out. I think he has every right to say something to. but her retort to him is that he knew she liked to party before they got married. She used to go to work, go home, go to church, softball games and the like but now that she is also looking at someone else, she uses going out as a means to go meet him, when he has the time. She is also partying with one of the husband's female friends. She claims she has invited the husband but he doesnt like to stay out long like she does and they dont like the same people. By the way, Blaque, most of this going out involves guys. She has racked up some phone numbers too but that is another story. I am not a party person per se. I just want someone (who is genuine) to go with me to church.
|
|
|
Post by Blaque on Aug 17, 2006 13:55:12 GMT -5
The fact that her husband knew she liked to party is not really an excuse in my opinion. The fact is that she is a married woman and that she should conduct herself that way. Going out occasionally is no big deal, but she is disrespecting her husband. Racking up phone numbers? Please, this is a no brainer. She needs to stay her behind at home and concentrate on her husband.
|
|
|
Post by pelicanguy on Aug 17, 2006 16:17:02 GMT -5
The fact that her husband knew she liked to party is not really an excuse in my opinion. The fact is that she is a married woman and that she should conduct herself that way. Going out occasionally is no big deal, but she is disrespecting her husband. Racking up phone numbers? Please, this is a no brainer. She needs to stay her behind at home and concentrate on her husband. I'm gonna have to agree with Blaque on this one. She is married. There are some things you are gonna have to give up when you get married. Marriage is a partnership requiring constant compromise. If she wanted to keep partying and stuff, she shouldn't have gotten married in the first place. She need to cut that mess out. I wouldn't be surprised - with the way she is acting - if she was to cheat on her husband. She is gonna piss her husband off to the point that he will file for divorce. Then that "he knew I liked to party before we were married" excuse won't cut it in court. She needs to respect her marriage.
|
|
|
Post by lusciouslois on Aug 17, 2006 16:23:19 GMT -5
Oh,I agree with both of you, but she has gotten this partying spirit back in her and can't turn it loose. She said that hubby said she could go out ONCE a week but not more than two or three times a week but that once a week is still causing problems. He is a sucker but that is another story for another time. I think he is in denial though.
|
|
|
Post by blackviking on Aug 18, 2006 8:50:48 GMT -5
I agree with all of you, except for the notion that this woman has "got the party spirit back in her".
The only thing she's got is boredom... with her man. She got married and she was happy doing all the things that Blaque and Brother B said she should be doing. Now... she's bored. He did something to decrease her interest in him, and now she's out every night looking for a new man. This is not abnormal behavior for a woman who's bored with a relationship.
|
|
|
Post by lusciouslois on Aug 18, 2006 9:14:18 GMT -5
I agree with all of you, except for the notion that this woman has "got the party spirit back in her". The only thing she's got is boredom... with her man. She got married and she was happy doing all the things that Blaque and Brother B said she should be doing. Now... she's bored. He did something to decrease her interest in him, and now she's out every night looking for a new man. This is not abnormal behavior for a woman who's bored with a relationship. Hey Viking that is a strong possibility. She has said that when the two of them go out, he is boring, but I don't know what else he may or may not have done.
|
|
|
Post by Blaque on Aug 18, 2006 10:03:02 GMT -5
Oh,I agree with both of you, but she has gotten this partying spirit back in her and can't turn it loose. She said that hubby said she could go out ONCE a week but not more than two or three times a week but that once a week is still causing problems. He is a sucker but that is another story for another time. I think he is in denial though. It sounds like her husband is trying to be compromising because he loves his wife and wants her to be happy. Even if she is bored like Viking suggested, she should be focused on spicing up her marriage, not going out with the girls and ignoring whatever problems they may be having.
|
|
|
Post by lusciouslois on Aug 18, 2006 10:05:32 GMT -5
Oh,I agree with both of you, but she has gotten this partying spirit back in her and can't turn it loose. She said that hubby said she could go out ONCE a week but not more than two or three times a week but that once a week is still causing problems. He is a sucker but that is another story for another time. I think he is in denial though. It sounds like her husband is trying to be compromising because he loves his wife and wants her to be happy. Even if she is bored like Viking suggested, she should be focused on spicing up her marriage, not going out with the girls and ignoring whatever problems they may be having. yup, yup
|
|
|
Post by pelicanguy on Aug 18, 2006 14:21:46 GMT -5
If she thinks things are not so good at home, why doesn't she try something to spice things up?
|
|
|
Post by lusciouslois on Aug 18, 2006 15:11:59 GMT -5
Y'all, she is partying with only ONE girl....her husband's coworker...the rest of the people are guys that they either know or have met while out and about...hence the extra phone numbers.
|
|
|
Post by dolphinfan on Aug 18, 2006 18:18:27 GMT -5
To me!!!! when a person makes an abrupt change, somethings up. be it good or bad.
|
|
|
Post by pelicanguy on Aug 18, 2006 18:47:31 GMT -5
Lois....don't be disclosing info you should have brought up when you first started this thread. That ain't cool.
|
|
sweetpie
B.E. Staff Sergeant
Posts: 2,081
|
Post by sweetpie on Aug 20, 2006 21:52:31 GMT -5
The fire to hang out was re-lit. She is interested in someone and this is a way for her to TRY to mask it. If she values her marriage and her husband's feelings she really needs to talk with him about various things that they can do together. But the thing seems to me is that she doesn't want to really make things work with him per se. With him not wanting to participate makes him look even more boring to her. She is treading in the green grass syndrome and what she really doesn't realize is that it really isn't worth it. Especially if what is going on between her and hubby isn't broken. She is about to break it though if she is not careful. Because a lot of times you get exactly what you ask for.
The stupid excuses are for her so-called benefit only. She is not kidding anyone and she is testing his patience. When he gets to the point he'll put his foot down. I'm sorry a woman doesn't want a weak acting man no matter how much he wants to make her happy.
|
|