Post by smarywills on Dec 5, 2006 16:24:54 GMT -5
In some workplaces, having communication issues is a common performance deficiency that African American employees hear about from management. But, what’s interesting about communication issues, from an African American standpoint, is that many of us only hear about this problem with respect to how we are supposedly communicating with White coworkers or supervisors.
It seems far rarer to be told, as a Black person, that you are having problems communicating with Black or other minority coworkers. Generally, the only cause for concern seems to be when an African American is alleged to be having a problem communicating with Whites. And, normally, it is the member of what I will call the “White half of the equation” that is reporting the problem to the chain-of-command.
Communication issues, from an African American perspective, is simply code for accusing a Black person—usually exclusively—of having a personal problem with a specific White coworker, supervisor, etc.
Unfortunately, some people seem to believe that Black folks have a monopoly on anger, vengefulness, spitefulness, shallowness, incompetence, laziness, and any other negative emotion or action that exists in the workplace. One of the harsh realities is that some non-Black workers truly believe the stereotypes that African Americans are quick to anger, are hypersensitive, and are childlike in handling their emotions. And, these are just the types of stereotypes that can lead to many communication issues between Blacks and Whites in the workplace.
How? Well, if a White person is prone to believe that a Black coworker is hypersensitive by default, anything that Black person says can be perceived to be based on emotions rather than based on reasoning. If a White person is prone to believe that a Black person is likely to be confrontational, simply because of their race, any of that Black person’s criticisms or strongly differing opinions will likely be attributed to that individual being angry or difficult rather than attributed to the fact that the White person may not have successfully argued their point, is dead wrong, or that the Black person simply didn’t agree with the White person’s point of view.
When it comes to so-called communication issues between Black and White staff, the issue often becomes one of personality/stereotypes rather than about the content of a verbal exchange between these individuals. And, as some of you are aware, when a communication issue has been brought to the attention of management, there’s often a meeting where the sole purpose of the gathering is to dissect the twisted interpretation of what the Black person said and how they allegedly made these remarks. Rarely, is the content of what the Black person said discussed in these forums.
Some of you may have been involved in discussions where you might have heard any of the following:
• "You seem upset.”
• “Try not to be sensitive.”
• “I think you’re being a little defensive.”
• "This is not a personal attack.”
• “I don’t want to get into a fight with you.”
• “You took it the wrong way.”
• “You have a very strong personality.”
• “Are you angry?”
Many times, African Americans are left scratching our heads, wondering how we get involved in discussions about our mindset and our moods. We often don’t know how a White coworker reached their conclusion regarding our so-called attitude. It’s unfortunate that many Blacks are automatically perceived to suffer from mood and personality disorders, while Whites perceive themselves to be level-headed and even-tempered—at all times. When that dynamic is in place, it is no wonder that Blacks are considered to be the sole source for any communication issues that may develop with a White coworker.
I’ve been told that I had communication issues that caused me to be “angry,” “defensive,” and “pissed.” This was in response to a professional conversation that I had with a White woman that didn’t care for what I had to say. The other Whites, including executives, immediately took her side, although time (a short 2 months) proved me to be right about what we were discussing. I never received an apology.
It’s hard to fight a stereotype that is perceived to be reality. Have you been accused of having “communication issues”? Tell us about it.
S. Mary Wills
theblackfactor.blogspot.com
The Black Factor is a useful resource for anyone who is Working While Black. The blog provides strategies for dealing with racially-based problems in the workplace, provides perspectives on workplace racism, and allows visitors to share experiences.
It seems far rarer to be told, as a Black person, that you are having problems communicating with Black or other minority coworkers. Generally, the only cause for concern seems to be when an African American is alleged to be having a problem communicating with Whites. And, normally, it is the member of what I will call the “White half of the equation” that is reporting the problem to the chain-of-command.
Communication issues, from an African American perspective, is simply code for accusing a Black person—usually exclusively—of having a personal problem with a specific White coworker, supervisor, etc.
Unfortunately, some people seem to believe that Black folks have a monopoly on anger, vengefulness, spitefulness, shallowness, incompetence, laziness, and any other negative emotion or action that exists in the workplace. One of the harsh realities is that some non-Black workers truly believe the stereotypes that African Americans are quick to anger, are hypersensitive, and are childlike in handling their emotions. And, these are just the types of stereotypes that can lead to many communication issues between Blacks and Whites in the workplace.
How? Well, if a White person is prone to believe that a Black coworker is hypersensitive by default, anything that Black person says can be perceived to be based on emotions rather than based on reasoning. If a White person is prone to believe that a Black person is likely to be confrontational, simply because of their race, any of that Black person’s criticisms or strongly differing opinions will likely be attributed to that individual being angry or difficult rather than attributed to the fact that the White person may not have successfully argued their point, is dead wrong, or that the Black person simply didn’t agree with the White person’s point of view.
When it comes to so-called communication issues between Black and White staff, the issue often becomes one of personality/stereotypes rather than about the content of a verbal exchange between these individuals. And, as some of you are aware, when a communication issue has been brought to the attention of management, there’s often a meeting where the sole purpose of the gathering is to dissect the twisted interpretation of what the Black person said and how they allegedly made these remarks. Rarely, is the content of what the Black person said discussed in these forums.
Some of you may have been involved in discussions where you might have heard any of the following:
• "You seem upset.”
• “Try not to be sensitive.”
• “I think you’re being a little defensive.”
• "This is not a personal attack.”
• “I don’t want to get into a fight with you.”
• “You took it the wrong way.”
• “You have a very strong personality.”
• “Are you angry?”
Many times, African Americans are left scratching our heads, wondering how we get involved in discussions about our mindset and our moods. We often don’t know how a White coworker reached their conclusion regarding our so-called attitude. It’s unfortunate that many Blacks are automatically perceived to suffer from mood and personality disorders, while Whites perceive themselves to be level-headed and even-tempered—at all times. When that dynamic is in place, it is no wonder that Blacks are considered to be the sole source for any communication issues that may develop with a White coworker.
I’ve been told that I had communication issues that caused me to be “angry,” “defensive,” and “pissed.” This was in response to a professional conversation that I had with a White woman that didn’t care for what I had to say. The other Whites, including executives, immediately took her side, although time (a short 2 months) proved me to be right about what we were discussing. I never received an apology.
It’s hard to fight a stereotype that is perceived to be reality. Have you been accused of having “communication issues”? Tell us about it.
S. Mary Wills
theblackfactor.blogspot.com
The Black Factor is a useful resource for anyone who is Working While Black. The blog provides strategies for dealing with racially-based problems in the workplace, provides perspectives on workplace racism, and allows visitors to share experiences.