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Post by Blaque on Apr 20, 2006 6:24:14 GMT -5
4/19/06
Another sleepless night. I'm not quite sure why for the past few months I am unable to sleep without medication. I guess Ido have a lot on my mind. Work is crazy. My son continues to have difficulties. Nothing seems to be going smoothly. But I am sure things will work out...they always do.
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bmoe
B.E. Member 2
Be thankful and make good of this time you have!
Posts: 69
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Post by bmoe on Apr 20, 2006 17:48:26 GMT -5
Look in to my eyes..... You are getting very sleepy... Sleepy..... (This better work) Sleepy..... (hold on the phone is ringing) (ok I'm back) Sleepy..... Sleepy..... Sleepy..... Hey wake up I am talking to you...
Sleepy.....
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Post by Blaque on Apr 20, 2006 18:03:03 GMT -5
Look in to my eyes..... You are getting very sleepy... Sleepy..... (This better work) Sleepy..... (hold on the phone is ringing) (ok I'm back) Sleepy..... Sleepy..... Sleepy..... Hey wake up I am talking to you... Sleepy.....
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Post by baswalla on Apr 20, 2006 19:33:34 GMT -5
I hope you get some sleep. Hell we need to talk at night then because my nights have been crappy too
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Post by Blaque on Apr 20, 2006 19:39:42 GMT -5
Ok, well we'll talk tonight and help each other out.
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Post by baswalla on Apr 20, 2006 19:44:33 GMT -5
ok
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Post by Blaque on Apr 21, 2006 9:35:40 GMT -5
It just doesn't seem to end. It feels like when one thing goes bad, another one follows. Then if something goes right, something else will drag you down. It's never controlled, never simple, never easy. Not one day. I haven't gone to sleep feeling positive, ready for tomorrow in quite some time. Sometimes I wish life would leave me alone for one day. One good day where no one complains, no one needs more than I can give, nothing exhausts me, nothing breaks, nothing haunts me... I just want to wake up feeling well-rested, go through my day doing things I like to do, or that I need to do and glad I got done. I want a day to be selfish, a day where I can tell everyone "No, TODAY is all about me". I don't want to feel guilty, I don't want to apologize, I don't want to care. I want one day where NO ONE puts me in the position where I have to stop smiling. I want to laugh and smile for a whole day. I want to have ONE GOOD dream. I don't know, maybe I'm asking for too much.
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Post by baswalla on Apr 22, 2006 9:49:08 GMT -5
you need a day with me there for that.
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Post by Blaque on Apr 22, 2006 12:05:33 GMT -5
you need a day with me there for that. I think so too.
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Post by baswalla on Apr 22, 2006 15:11:05 GMT -5
I better get there fast
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Post by Blaque on Apr 22, 2006 15:27:52 GMT -5
Very fast.
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Post by baswalla on Apr 22, 2006 15:28:36 GMT -5
I know.
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Post by Blaque on Apr 23, 2006 11:03:36 GMT -5
I've been thinking a lot lately about fate. I believe that everything is as it was meant to be, even when it feels like a mistake. On the other hand, I believe that we have control over what our fate is, or at least fate lines some things up for us, but it's up to us to actually make it happen. I can't decide between the two because they both make so much sense. It's like in the Alchemist - the universe is constantly supplying us with signs so that we may discover and live out our destinies. We forever have the option to just quit when our The Master calls us forward. Maybe that's the beauty in our freedom...freedom is the one true gift from God. He knows everything, He sees our destiny, He leads us toward it, but it is up to us to fulfill it.
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Post by Blaque on Apr 25, 2006 13:34:42 GMT -5
I used to believe that I had it all together. I use to think that I was the rational one, the one people came to when they needed sound advice. But I have come to the conclusion that I make just as many bad choices as the next person. I'm no better;no worse. Still, for some reason, people want to talk to me about their relationships. Me...that's funny for may reasons. What I have come to realize is that people for whatever reason have equated pain with love. So many people give themselves these small dosages of pain because they're so afraid of what happens if they quit it. Relationships become heroine. People would rather be addicted and go crazy than detoxify. Letting go is the worst part, even if it's the best thing that ever happened to you. I have a friend going through that now, two friends, in fact. It's not easy to let go. You want so badly for things to be like you want them to be, what you might have thought they were at one point…what they might have actually been at one point, but they're not anymore. You hope for it so hard that you convince yourself that if you stick around, you might get to see that person change, and if he changes, you'll still be there to be with him. My friends know all these things logically, but it's a different situation when your heart is involved. I know so many people who have gone through this, and somehow one can only see it clearly when it's anyone other than themselves.
Letting go is such a hard thing to do. But once you do it and you don't look back, it's like taking a deep breath of fresh air after being under water. It's life-saving.
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Post by dolphinfan on Apr 25, 2006 21:05:13 GMT -5
4/19/06 Another sleepless night. I'm not quite sure why for the past few months I am unable to sleep without medication. I guess Ido have a lot on my mind. Work is crazy. My son continues to have difficulties. Nothing seems to be going smoothly. But I am sure things will work out...they always do. First things FIRST..........WOMAN!!!! Get off the Medication!!! Second, You are no good to your son, if you ain't right!!! find the proper facilities!!! or family members, and take a FEW DAY OFF!!! Yeah they will work themselves out okay, YOU'll be burnt out!!! and no good to ANYBODY!!! *Dolphin talking to himself*;Nothing worst then a BURNT OUT BLAQUE WOMEN . *Now heading to BED*!!!
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